Integrity within yourself

Integrity... More powerful than a locomotive... and yet few choose to embrace it and harness its true power. This won't be a long post at all but it will have a powerful message it.

A friend of mine went to one of those "life coach" seminars and when they came back they had a lil bit of advice to share with me. They said that sometimes the issue that you have with other people is actually an issue that you have within yourself. Prime example: Integrity. I have a problem with people who don't seem to have a high level of integrity. People with low levels of integrity are NOTORIOUS for not keeping their word, lying and/or not telling the WHOLE truth, selling dreams (aka making empty promises), being deceitful (example: leading someone into a false assumption and not correcting them), etc. Now, those of you who know me know that I try my best not to do ANY of those things, especially not on a consistent basis. I ALWAYS try keep my word to EVERYONE... except myself. You see, if I was true to myself, the people who DO have a problem being real wouldn't even be around me. They wouldn't be in my life to lie or deceive or make empty promises; especially not more than once. Do you understand?

I'll give you an example: a woman who says that she's tired of dealing with a man who puts everyone and everything else before her. She argues, fusses, and fights with him over the fact that he doesn't spend enough time with her. He apologizes and swears that he will do better, but within a few days, he's right back up to his same antics and she's mad again. Rinse and repeat. If she had a high level of integrity within herself, once she recognized a particular bad trait, said "I don't like (insert whatever pisses you off here)", and recognized (after a giving them time to do better) that they weren't going to change, she would have left that bad situation alone and begin searching again for friendships/relationships that don't posses the traits that she hates.

But no.

Her integrity is low, so she deals with it, calls it love/destiny, and he hurts her over and over again. Eventually she becomes damaged to the point where she utters those famous words "N*ggas aint sh*t" and sinks into a level of bitterness or defensiveness that only God Himself can break her out of. This scenario happens to some women. When it does, they often begin to exhibit the traits of the person who hurt them - becoming unreliable and dishonest. This leads to them hurting guys... who leave them and hurt girls... who leave and hurt other guys... who leave and hurt other girls... Rinse and repeat.

This horrible cycle goes on until God, or someone God sent comes along who is patient (or foolish), enough to deal with the broken pieces of the heart within the individual they are in a relationship with.

Where am I, you ask? I am asking God to put the right people around me who can handle the simple things I listed above and remove the people who cant get it right. And while many say that everyone deserves a second chance... It would be foolish to continue to think that way after chance number 8.

So examine yourself tonight. See what it is that needs work in your life after doing a lil introspection and begin making a conscious effort to work on it. Remember: No one is perfect...

Just some good advice

Today, I had an epiphany... I'm going to give you a lil advice: When God places people in your life, you'll know it. You'll know it because that person will come in and fit into your life like a puzzle piece; a puzzle piece that is gradually grafted in by God himself. A person sent by God will never be a distraction from God, but is often used as an asset to bring a deeper relationship and understanding of God.

Our entire life involves interaction with other human beings. Quite often I have fussed and fought over opportunities, friendships, situations and relationships that were sinking ships well before the boat even touched water. Not understanding that everything that didn't go right, didn't go right for a reason. There was a reason for each and every failure; every struggle. There was a reason for each and every disappointment. That reason was to mature me and get me to a point within myself where I can recognize the type of people that needed to be eradicated from my life and the people who I needed to hold onto very tightly. Once you figure that out, you have to let the dead weight go. Holding on to dead weight will only slow down your forward progress. If you need to forgive, do it. Do it and let God move them out of the way so that you can have room for the people who are to be a blessing in your life.

God needs to be the common denominator in every decision that is made.

Every single person in your life should be held to that standard. Examine your friends next time you're around them. Who brings the best out of you and who are the people who seem to pull you down and away from God with pity party conversations or self hatred, negative talk, depressed mentalities, lustful conversation, etc.? If someone is completely consuming your every thought, distracting you with foolishness/drama, leading you into a path of degradation, continually causing you problems or heartache or headaches, it might be time to let them go. No matter how long you all have been friends, I don't personally feel that God will bring anyone into your life who will pull you away from Him. God is not an author of confusion and, while He may allow crazy people to pass through to teach you a lesson, those people must vanish when the lesson is over. Know this: In the end, the result is always a stronger faith in God.

PS: Give people their flowers while they can smell them. In other words, let people know you appreciate them and how much they mean to you while they're still alive. You never know when you may be seeing someone for the very last time.

Priestly Love

So the other day I read this article and it made me think a lil bit... It's a case where a priest basically got blacklisted by his church for getting caught on photograph kissing his girlfriend (who he later married). The line that got me thinking was where he said "There are so many homosexuals, both active and celibate, at all levels of clergy and Church hierarchy that the church would never be able to function if they were really to exclude all of them from ministry." The article also speaks of relationships, both homosexual and heterosexual, being prevalent; only becoming a problem once they are made public.

I'm really beginning to wonder what the issue is... I mean honestly, why won't the church allow them to date with the intentions of eventually getting married? Doesn't the bible (the book that they are supposed to be following) say that it "is better to marry than to burn?!" Being able to be a eunuch without being... well... you know... is something that I would say would have to be a special powered assignment and gift from God; a gift that few people have. And while I expect a priest to have discipline and self control, why is it that these men are required to hide their relationships when the bible itself makes room for heterosexual marriages (homosexuality is another, entirely different issue...) and you NEED to date before you get married? Without arranged marriages, it seems quite implausible.

I can understand, for the sake of reducing illegitimate children or disease, making someone of the clergy be chaste but, in a society where low self esteem and insecurity runs rampant, I don't see many significant others sitting well with hearing "Let's just keep our relationship between me and you. No one else needs to know about 'us', OK?"

To be completely honest, the church doesn't seem to deal with sexuality well at all. "Wait til marriage" will not suffice for an over-sexed, under-parented, rebellious teenager when dealing with the hormones that begin to rage after being bombarded with sexual images from today's media. I don't have any answers other than chaperoned dating when the kids are young and monitored media intake (extreme, I know). As far as the priest is concerned, black listing him for getting "caught" dating is absurd; it just seems a lil backwards to me to say you can marry but you can't date.

The Ice Cream Mane... GUCCI!!! BURR!!!

I have no words to speak on how foolish this is. This fella, Gucci Mane, has done about the dumbest thing I have EVER seen any rapper do! I mean, I understand getting tattoos, I might even give you a pass on getting the tattoo put on your face, but an ICE CREAM CONE on your face?! How about a ice cube? An icicle? A snow ball? ANYTHING that doesn't look as childish as 3 scoops of Baskin Robbins on your face!!! And he got this to CELEBRATE being RELEASED from the psychiatric ward?!

That's quite a way to prove the general public that you have been rehabbed...

If you wanted attention, Gucci, you got it. Meanwhile... On the bright side of things, I'm sure this helps the insanity plea look real AND ice cream IS delicious. Lol!

Secretly I'm hoping that this is a fake, digitally edited photo that will be forgotten about in the near future.

Almost Rich and Nearly Famous...

And here it is.... Our very own Matta Fact's new (sophomore) project. You have seen him on a previous post with a previous album as well as in many of our trips through the city of Atlanta. Now you can see him again... in the music. SEE the music. Click on the album cover below to download it and enjoy!

Phat Comedy...

So this information came across my email a few days ago... I've went before, it was pretty good. The comedy was cool, environment was cool, the music cool, the waitresses were cute, etc. I know its frozen in Atlanta this week.... I know this.... but this happens EVERY WEDNESDAY! You see the flier! EVERY WEDNESDAY! You got time to make it to bible study and then go to 255 to eat and stuff. The headliner should just be getting up by the time you show up. SUPPORT!!! Look at the information below and click on PHAT COMEDY to go to their website. Later.

Transformation talks...

To be honest with you all... I aint never been fat a day in my life. But I came across this video and I listened to it. She has some very good advice; not just for fat people, but advice skinny people or ANYBODY with esteem issues can learn from. It was good "Transformation" advice... specifically coming from her experience of loosing weight and changing from a "big girl" to a "skinny girl". Peep the video below.

(Sidenote: she starts out sounding like she about to do some spoken word but she doesn't; it's only used to open up her video).

Apple... got... hacked...

Ok... So this is kind crazy. Apple got hacked and someone in china is selling off user names and passwords. Not only can people charge up your account, they can also charge up stuff on your card...


It's a good day to log in and check on your stuff if you aren't already on top of it. That is all.

Laws of Attraction

I remember coming across an article on yahoo a while back and it was talkin about what men and women find attractive in each other based on scientific studies. Now, I always have had my own interpretation of why and how women choose up and stuff like that but this article was very close to being slightly ridiculous. If I remember correctly, it said that women found men with more masculine facial characteristics to be great for short term relationships but men with more feminine characteristics such as larger lips and more rounded jaw bones where better targets for long term relationships. In the same breath it went on to say that the more masculine men were the choice for majority of the women to "mate" with because of the thought that they would have stronger jeans. So let me get this straight, get pregnant by Walker Texas Ranger and spend the rest of your time, after he gets done, looking for a male version of Martha Stuart to take care of you and somebody else's kids? I cant say that's cool... but that's what the studies say.

I went on to visit another website that deals with the same topic and this site took it a little further and went on to say that its about a person's genes moreso than what that person looks like. It even went on to talk about how a person is gonna be attracted to another person by their smell and also the by the amount their immune system differs. The idea is to find someone who has an immune system much different from yours in order to insure that your kid has the greatest chance for survival. Yeah..... All this stuff is basically happening without us even knowing its happening. I can only describe it as the reason a person may still be attached to somebody who treats them like dirt and they cant seem to leave them alone. Its either the immune system... or the (Insert sexual organ here).

The article did have some other points that I did agree with. For example, it talked about how the words we say don't really mean anything. You can beg, and beg, and beg but if they dont want you, they dont want you. Most of the communication is in the body language of the individual. Imitation is the greatest indicator of admiration. If that person mirrors your actions, more than likely they enjoy you as a person on some level; otherwise, they wouldn't act like you. It also went on to talk about how we usually want someone who looks and/or act like us, our parents or our siblings because that's what we grew up seeing. I thought it was crazy at first, then I thought about most of the women I had been in relationships with....

The last thing that stuck out in my mind was the fact that people are attracted to people who are symmetrical. Identifying symmetrical features as someone having good genes and someone who has asymmetrical features as a person who probably has weak genes or some "defects".

I cant say I co-sign everything in these articles but if they are true, it would explain some of my unexplainable episodes with certain females. It would also explain why its important for families to be just that - families; with both mother and father in the home. Otherwise, the child may not have a point of reference when looking for a potential mate. I don't know though. Being attracted to a mate by smell is a crazy thought and that whole immune system thing was just bananas. But, who knows, it could be true....

Do better now, not later.

Saw this online and it sparked something in me... Motivation. It sparked motivation to do better now, not "sometime soon." It reminded me that, you can have all the formal education, talent, and know how in the world, but if you don't make the right decisions when the right opportunity arises, you can end up S.O.L.

This man has "THE" radio voice, but he is begging on the side of the road. While someone else, who may not even be as good as he is, is somewhere eating steaks...

At any rate, I'm posting this video for you to see. Who knows, maybe my post will be the one to get the exposure this man needs to get a job. Hey, it could happen... (Thanks McDonald's)

UPDATE: This just in... He got a job offer within 24 hours... He's off the streets. Click here for the full story.